In one of the most bizarre stories in a long career filled with silliness, Shaquille O’Neal has been tied to an investigation that alleges a bunch of gang members kidnapped a music promoter who had an old sex tape of the now-retired big man boning down with some lady that isn’t his wife, back when he was still married. Somehow, this isn’t a joke. From the Los Angeles Times:

Seven members of a South Los Angeles street gang have been charged with kidnapping and other crimes after they allegedly abducted a man who claimed he had a sex tape of former Lakers center Shaquille O’Neal.

Ladell Rowles, who prosecutors said was the leader of the Main Street Mafia Crips gang, is accused in a criminal complaint filed in February of directing members to kidnap, beat and rob the victim. Details of the case became public in the last few days when a preliminary hearing got underway in L.A. court. Prosecutors stress that they have no evidence that a sex tape exists and said O’Neal is not involved in the case.

See? Very real. Very strange. Very “Road Trip.” And despite prosecutors stressing that they have no evidence that a Shaq sex tape exists, it very much does.

How can I be so sure? Easy. It’s after the jump.

Truly disturbing.