As we all know, Carmelo Anthony and La La Vasquez are our generation’s Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe. The dude is a professional athlete who plays in New York, the lady is a beautiful person who is remembered for one thing but no one really knows what they are really famous for. They are in love, but also in business. It’s a good time.

And it all started a long time ago, when Carmelo saw La La in a club and played it super cool. From the New York Times:

She narrowed her eyes, recounting the story of how Mr. Anthony first tried to woo her in a New York club, sending over a bottle of Moët & Chandon. “I thought it was so lame,” she said. “He was like, ‘What are you doing after the club?’ I’m like: ‘After the club? It’s 2 a.m. I’m going home. What are you doing after the club?’

Classic romance tale that all of us normal guys are going to have a hard time living up to. Bottles of champagne are expensive, especially if you’re sending them to ladies who don’t even care that you did it. Thanks for nothing, Melo.

That little nugget of love comes from the Times’ profile of La La, and while it’s the best part, it’s not the only good part. For instance, the part when Carmelo talks about what kind of couple they want to be like is pretty great.

“Will and Jada have a tremendous relationship,” he said. “Jay-Z and Beyoncé have a tremendous relationship, Swizz Beatz and Alicia Keys, they’re a couple we see that inspire us.

“But we want to be ourselves. We want people to say, ‘We want our relationship to be like Melo and La La.’ ”

Maybe it’s just me, but I definitely want a relationship inspired by Will Smith, Jay-Z and Swizz Beatz. (I imagine that would involve a lot of smiling, rapping and lucrative product endorsements.) If that means that I want my relationship to be like Melo and La La, then so be it. I’m forcing a trade to New York as we speak.

Comments (45)

  1. Awesome. Two things:

    1) I saw a magazine on the newsstand the other day that looked like US Weekly but was called “JUICY” and the cover named Melo and La La the “JUICIEST COUPLE.” Can’t really argue with that.

    2) I’ve always loved this, from Chris Ballard’s Hoops Whisperer piece: (apologies if the formatting comes out all wonked)

    Ravin’s rapport with his clients comes in part from spending time with their families and friends. Sometimes they too have to be won over. When Ravin first met Anthony’s fiancee, deejay LaLa Vasquez, who’d played hoops in high school, she was skeptical. She looked him up and down and demanded, “What do you know about basketball?”

    “Let me show you,” Ravin said, and the two headed down to the gym in the basement of Anthony’s house. (A home gym comes in handy in these situations.) For half an hour Ravin worked with Vasquez on her shot. When they emerged, she said to Anthony, “O.K., he’s all right.”

    “In minutes he improved my shot,” Vasquez recalls, “and I knew he was the one.”

  2. Bottles of champagne are expensive, especially if you’re sending them to ladies who don’t even care that you did it. Thanks for nothing, Melo

    That’s the first time in a long time that I’ve really laughed out loud after reading this board. Great work!

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