John Salmons is famous for three things: being a professional basketball player, having a name that looks like it should be pronounced like a fish but isn’t, and having a terrible goatee. As far as things to be recognized for, those are pretty chill. But we’ll soon add another layer to Salmons’ fame onion, as he is set to release the first season of his men’s clothing line in spring 2012.

The line is called Salmons & Brown, and from looking at the first photoshoot, it looks like John is a big fan of camo pants, which I assume he got that from his time playing with Brad Miller. There’s also a linen trenchcoat that looks like a physician’s lab coat and totally misses the point of a trenchcoat since linen absorbs water, but whatever. Other notable items include v-neck t-shirts, a navy blue button-front utility shirt and a white suede biker jacket that would get very dirty if you ever actually wore it on a motorcycle.

So yes, very soon you will be able to dress exactly like John Salmons. Here’s hoping he put a special John Salmons-inspired guarantee in to every item of clothing Salmons & Brown produces, where if you don’t like your clothes any more, you can just trade them in halfway through the season for some better ones. Just be careful though. As soon as you make that trade, your Salmons & Brown gear starts looking really good.

Comments (9)

  1. No fish-in-lieu-of-gator Lacoste knock-off? Cmon, man. It designs itself!

  2. FINALLY, it’s here

  3. Give the kid on the left a sandwich

  4. At first, I read “John Stockton clothing line”. Now that would be interesting, right?

  5. Short shorts are super in right now.

  6. Pretty weird that John Salmon’s fashion line is actually fashionable.

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