Of course Michael Jordan has giant versions of all six of his championship rings on his golf bag. Did you expect him not to? Don’t be silly. It’s for intimidation, and I’m guessing it’s pretty effective. Picture-painting time.

Just imagine you paid a significant fee to participate in some pro-am event that you know Michael Jordan is going to be playing in. So you steel yourself, knowing that you’re going to eventually see him and you’ll probably freak out and hit some bad drives. You know this, so you plan for it, and eventually you become prepared enough that you’re confident that you could accidentally encounter Michael Jordan and still be able to play some decent golf.

Then you get to the event, clean your spikes, pull on your visor like a bro and hit the links, where you find out you’re one of the lucky guys who gets Michael Jordan in his foursome. “No big deal,” you think. You’ve been preparing for this for weeks. You’ll be fine. You got this.

Then Jordan rolls up, pulls out his six rings bag and you immediately pee your Payne Stewart pants like a ninny.

Oh well, there’s always next year.

(via Terez Owens/Deadspin)