There are two schools of thought with regards to having laughs about being ready to play basketball in less than two weeks. You can go the DeMarcus Cousins route and just list a bunch of foods you like to eat and “pretend” you spent all lockout eating them while becoming really, really fat because all you do is play video games. This is called the “What People Think You Really Did” approach.

Or you can choose the Metta World Peace option and tell people you’re so sexy that you must be in shape. This is called “The Shawn Michaels.”

As you can see, both of these joke styles are very effective and great at laughter. The Cousins Method doesn’t get as big of laughs, but they last for a long time. The Peace Plan gets one huge stab of guffaws.

To be honest, you can’t go wrong either way. The California professional basketball players improv scene is doing some pretty great things.