Way back in the beginning of January, Kobe Bryant said his New Year’s resolution was to stop cursing in interviews. ‘Twas a noble gesture for a dad with two growing daughters, especially since his late period cussing period was starting to win him back some fans.
It seems like he’s holding true to his word, giving this hilarious response to an email asking if he’s the reason Dwight Howard doesn’t want to sign an extension with the Lakers. From the New York Post:
“omg! I’m not getting mixed up in this kiddy drama spit, bro. too old for that spit,” Bryant responded via email.
Too old for “kiddy drama spit,” but apparently not too old to use the term “kiddy drama spit.” Real Catch-24 situation right there.
If Dwight Howard didn’t want to sign with the Lakers, I’m not sure how he’ll feel after seeing this response. Maybe this is Kobe trying to convince him that he wants him in Los Angeles while also trying to make it seem like he’s not on the downside of his career, kind of like a dad buying a really sweet pair of jeans to seem cool to his kids. Dwight seems in to wacky, childish things so maybe it’ll work.
Props to Kobe for doing his best to not swear — though, I guess, Peter Vescey could be doing a little editing for Kobe to make him look good but let’s just chill with the Kobspiracy theories and also the bad Kobe puns — but it came out hilarious. This is one of the most competitive professional athletes we’ve even seen and he’s typing “omg!” and “kiddy drama spit” like he’s a teenager who doesn’t want his mom to see him swearing in text messages. This is pilgrim hat funny.