If you know two things about Mike Woodson, odds are they both relate to facial hair.

  1. He has the strongest goatee in the league. It’s just a thick black stripe of hair from nose to chin, broken up only by a pair of lips.
  2. His eyebrows once disappeared with no explanation for their absence, only to be replaced by Velcro strips.

That was more than two years ago and even though it was the weirdest thing to happen to an NBA face in the past decade, Steve Nash’s eyeball free throw face excepted, no one has ever really given a reason for why it happened. Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be a conclusion coming in the near future. From the New York Times:

In January 2010, Hawks players and staff members dubbed their coach Mr. Potato Head, after Woodson’s eyebrows mysteriously disappeared. (The phenomenon has never been explained; some speculate that Woodson, an avid cigar smoker, might have accidentally burned them off.) Woodson laughed along with his players.

OK, so this isn’t definitely the reason Mike Woodson’s eyebrows were gone that one fateful night, but it’s a better explanation than the possibly apocryphal story that Woodson shaved off his eyebrows to motivate the Hawks. If Mike Woodson really did burn off his eyebrows with a cigar, then that’s even funnier than anything you could have made up.

That being said, if you were to come up with a better cover story for Woodson’s missing brows and put it in the comments, I wouldn’t mind.

Comments (6)

  1. He’s secretly an evil genius who while one day working in his lab blew them off….

    his cats now hairless.

  2. My Theory: Mike Woodson’s eyebrows were shaved off when he went through his “Chola” stage. The NBA’s anti-gang affiliation rules insisted he cover up his “Chola Eyebrows” or risk being fined.

  3. He plucked one eyebrow hair for every million the Hawks gave Joe Johnson..

    He will pick up where he left off soon.

  4. I heard it was an unsuccessful hair transplantation. After hair from the left eyebrow didn’t look the way he liked, he used the right one to give himself a bitchin’ landing strip.

  5. Quite probably, Woodson’s eyebrows literally flew off his face after the umpteenth time he quickly shot his eyes open in absolute shock and awe at yet another 25-foot Josh Smith jumper mere seconds into a possession.

  6. He looks really funny with the eyebrows. Velcro strips? He can afford more than that, right? Maybe he is just doing that to divert the attention to his eyebrows but still that becomes the center of attention and being laughed about.

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