Were you worried that those giant foam statues of LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh that you had commissioned weren’t going to be ready for the playoffs? Don’t fret. They’re ready. Just in time.
We got the news about your statues from Hot Hot Hoops, who tracked down the gigantoid pieces of art at PrimeTime Amusements. They’re made completely out of foam, and according to their president, who is also a Heat season ticket holder, they’re pretty much just made because they can be. Why not, right? If you can build a huge Big Three, you probably should. No reason not to.
So, you wanna take a closer look at your statues? You paid a lot for them, so I definitely think you should inspect them.
Here’s your LeBron James statue. We shaved his armpits for you. No worries.
This is your Dwyane Wade. We put him in hooker boots as a joke. I don’t really remember what it is now, but it was hilarious when we were making the mold. Trust me.
Oh, and here’s your Chris Bosh. We modeled his face on Romany Malco’s.
Were you concerned the statues weren’t big enough? Come over here and stand by them real quick.
Yeah, I’d say they’re big enough. Have fun with your statues.