As we all know, this summer’s Olympics are “the Social Media Games.” And as such, athletes from so many countries are tweeting pictures of their teammates (usually sleeping) and all the silly stuff they do when they’re not competing in their events. Team USA’s basketball squad is probably the best at this, constantly Instagramming photos and just generally chilling with their buddies.
Seeing all these pictures has left me with one very important question: Why are Chris Paul’s hats so big?
If you don’t believe me, just look at this important diagram that shows how much headroom he’s got underneath his cap. I superimposed a photo of Chris’ head on top of his real head, lining up the eyes and nose as closely as possible, and the results are staggering.
That is a lot of hat room, you guys. Probably too much, but maybe he likes a nice, airy headspace.
Nonetheless, if you think this was a one-time, jokey-joke hat perch, you are mistaken. Look.
The crown is so baggy it’s wrinkling. Get some head in that hat.
Oh, come on. That is a six-inch tall hat, at least. Incredible.
But it’s not just backwards. No, Chris Paul’s giant hats come from all directions.
You can barely see his face his hat is so big. (Also, there is a LEGO corgi.)
Again, note the wrinkly crown due to the huge hat.
Runs in the family, I guess.
It hasn’t always been like this though. When he first came in to the league, Chris Paul wore hats that fit his head.
And this recent picture with some Clippers teammates proves he can still wear a cap that actually follows the contours of his skull.
From this we can surmise that Chris Paul just prefers to wear a super tall hat. As Patrick Cosmos suggested on Twitter, it’s possible that Chris’ giant hats are related “somehow to how mad he got when Pau [Gasol] rubbed his head.” Considering Adrian Beltre has a similar phobia regarding his head being touched, it seems logical.
Who knows? Maybe Chris Paul just really hates anytime anything touches his head, hats included. But Beltre seems to wear a hat that fits well, so I guess we’re back to square one. If you have any evidence to crack this case, please let us know. It’s of the utmost importance.