I don’t know what to say, you guys. Kris Humphries did something silly again. From TMZ:

Kris Humphries’ lawyer engineered a sneak attack by trying to serve a subpoena on Kanye West by putting it in a Nordstrom box and sending it to Kim Kardashian’s house.

Cool sneak attack, Kris Humphries. Super covert. Only thing better would have been wrapping the subpoena in a Givenchy sweatshirt and a pair of leather pants. Very smooth, Rob Thomas.

Also this:

[Kim Kardashian's lawyer Laura] Wasser said she’s heard the reports that Kris and his lawyers want to put reality TV on trial, and there seems to be evidence to back that up. Wasser noted that Kris has served Kris Jenner with a subpoena and NBC Universal and Bunim/Murray, which produces the Kardashian reality shows.

Hey, just so everyone knows, Kris Humphries is putting reality television on trial. To repeat he is PUTTING REALITY TV ON TRIAL. He might not be the hero our generation wants, but he’s the hero our generation deserves. You want the reality TV? You can’t handle the reality TV. Kris Humphries ordered the reality TV code red and he’d do it again if he had to.

Just chill, Kris Humphries. You are making $12 million to play basketball this year, you zinged Kanye West on Twitter and everyone thought it was great, and you don’t have to be on Kim Kardashian’s show any more. Realize you were a pawn in a reality TV show and move on. It’s not like you didn’t benefit greatly from it, aside from becoming the NBA’s most disliked player, which sucks but is not that big of a deal. People will forget about that Kim Kardashian stuff eventually. You’re rich, you’re young, you’re playing basketball in New York, people know who you are — things are good, man. Sure, you fell in love with a girl who just wanted to get married to an athlete for TV ratings, but whatever. That kind of thing could happen to any of us. There’s no need to put reality TV on trial because that is not a real thing and “Survivor” is a great show. Just relax.

Comments (12)

  1. Sue the crap out of them, Kris.

  2. Bunim/Murray productions doctored the flight tower logs to make it look like the planes never took off from Guantanamo Bay.

  3. The batman line made my day

  4. Just don’t go too ballistic, Kris. Like this guy did:


  5. While I understand the classic “let’s make fun of this weeks stupid off court choice,” don’t rag on the dude for going after reality TV. Reality TV is to TV as tabloids are to Journalism, they’re exploiting the ever shrinking attention span of the American public and further glorifying the celebrity lifestyle of doing jack shit and still making lots of dough. People blame Bush tax cuts, or Obama, or Mexican immigrants, but the bottom line is America is shitty right now because we’re lazy assholes, and reality TV, holding up more time slots on channels than sports or news, is distorting the minds of our generation. If you’re gonna hate on something, hate equally. Hell, you guys are getting pretty dangerously close to tabloid-esque as is, maybe you’re not trying to be journalists.

  6. Someone needs to put a stop to Reality TV and most importantly teh Karderrsheans. Kris’ rep is fuck anyway, so I think he is the man to do it. Sue the shit out of them Kris!

  7. I have the feeling that Julian is asking for a Cool Story Bro

  8. I’m amazed he doesn’t have a new girl yet, he’s an incredible rebounder.

  9. His reputation is going to rise with every such move. Nice attack, true hipster style.

  10. Leaving a Nordstroms box is the perfect mix of London meet Milan. Very polished hipster of you, Kris.

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