Just the other day, Skeets and I got in to a discussion about the best nicknames of all-time. The legends were all considered (the Iceman, Cornbread, the Matrix) and the sad state of current affairs was lamented (D-Will, D-Rose, D-Wade), then finally we concluded that having a name that’s good for rhyming typically makes for some of the best nicknames (the Stilt, the Glide, the Vanilla Gorilla).
But here’s a new category we didn’t consider — players being nicknamed after 1990s sitcoms. Because apparently, that’s all the rage. From Rockets.com:
JCF: I’ve noticed a lot of talk about Chandler Parsons nicknames of late. I saw Daryl Morey and Matt Bullard discussing that very topic via Twitter last week. What do you want to be called?
CP: Honestly, I was kind of feeling the Chandler Bang for a little bit …
JCF: I always thought that one fit the best.
CP: I like that. I hate Mad Chicken. I think that’s the corniest, most awful nickname ever. And I can’t be CP; there can only be one CP in the NBA. So I think I like Chandler Bang.
Yeah, of course. Who wouldn’t love being nicknamed after a beloved sitcom character notorious for his sarcasm? Plus, he’s got the hair for it. Could “Chandler Bang” be a more perfect nickname for Chandler Parsons?
And if he likes that nickname, then he’s going to love these.
- Jeff “Rachel” Green, power forward for the Boston Celtics
- David Schwingate, former journeyman shooting guard
- Jay Tribbianio, former coach of the Toronto Raptors
- Ramonica “Gellar” Sessions, point guard for the Charlotte Bobcats
- Koebe Bryfayant, shooting guard for the Los Angeles Lakers
- Steven Gunther, former 76ers center
I see where Chandler Parsons is coming from with this, because coming up with “Friends”-themed nicknames is pretty fun. Feel free to add yours in the comments.