Huge, life-changing news out of the league office last night. From NBA.com’s David Aldridge:

The league will announce Wednesday a change to its All-Star ballot that will, for the first time, allow fans to vote for three undefined “frontcourt” players instead of having to vote for two forwards and a center. With more and more teams playing smaller than in the past, the definition of “center” was becoming increasingly difficult — not to mention finding enough quality big men for whom to vote.

Now you might be thinking that this isn’t a big deal and that random centers are often the least deserving All-Stars on their respective teams, simply because they’re forced in there due to their coaches deciding to list them as centers during the regular season. But that’s exactly the point — without a couple of undeserving All-Stars now and then, we’ll be missing out on a whole bunch of jokes.

For instance, if center was never a defined position for the All-Star Game, the following jokes wouldn’t even exist.

  • Any and all references to the time Jamaal Magloire made an All-Star team (2004), despite the fact he played pretty well the one time he made it.
  • Roy Hibbert telling us at this past All-Star Game that his superpower would be to never stop growing.
  • Tas being infatuated with Al Horford’s beautiful eyes during media day.
  • Chris Kaman and David Lee taking basketball back to the 1980s during the 2010 All-Star Game
  • Brad Miller going down in history as one of the few players to have played in back-to-back All-Star Games while switching conferences in between.
  • All those times Dikembe Mutombo would freak out during boring dunks at the dunk contest.
  • Jermaine O’Neal ruining Michael Jordan’s 2003 game-winner with a really dumb foul on Kobe Bryant.
  • Michael Jordan getting dap from Brad Miller and Zydrunas Ilgauskas of all people after hitting that should-have-been game-winner.
  • A man named James Donaldson going down as the worst All-Star ever, being selected to the 1988 game during a season where he averaged seven points and nine rebounds per game.

As you can see, there is a lot at stake here. I know we are in the midst of the Positional Revolution and that this is supposed to reflect that, but we are still living in the Meme Society and I think we can all agree that All-Star laughs are some of the best things about All-Star Weekend. This is truly the end of an era.

Rest in peace, center spot. By being so bad, you’ve been very good to us.

Comments (10)

  1. They NBA did this so Pekovic can get in the All Star game instead of being blocked by Howard.

  2. that doesnt make any sense scott

  3. I’m guessing the next change is going to be that instead of voting for two “Guards” the category is now “Guards who didn’t go to Harvard.”

  4. What does this have to do with Jermaine O’Neal, a power forward, making the ASG in a year he finished third in MVP balloting?

  5. I’m still shocked over the fact the league made a common sense decision.

  6. Is there still going to be a PG and a SG? Or are they just going to go with 2 “backcourt” players?

    And what will happen to swingmen SG/SF players? Are they backcourt or frontcourt?

    • It was already 2 G, 2 F, 1 C. I believe each team is given the option on both which players they nominate and what position they’re eligible at.

  7. Wait,

    This means that there can be an ASG team with no centers?

  8. I hope people vote three centers into the three frontcourt positions.

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