Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Look NBA guys, us commoners/coyotes just want a quick touch with greatness. We’re not asking for much — just a little skin-to-skin action to see if it’s actually possible to steal your superpowers like we are Rogue from the X-Men. It’s probably not going to happen, so you don’t have to worry that much, but a little dap would be appreciated.

No pressure, just think about it. Nothing creepy will happen. Probably.

(first video via CJ Fogler)