The Portland Trail Blazers are in Washington, D.C., trying to hand the Wizards their 13th consecutive loss to start the season. This is great news for fans of history, but terrible for rookie point guards who are legitimately scared of statues of dead people.

From Damian Lilllard’s Twitter:

I like DC. I wana come back and visit the memorials even though I’m scared of statues

People I’m only scared of historic statues. Abraham Lincoln , MLK, etc . Had a bad experience at the wax museum lmao

I’m not sure what’s weirder here — that Damian Lillard is scared of statues or the idea of having a bad experience at the wax museum. Either way, it sounds like Damian Lillard should definitely avoid this place because that seems like a disaster waiting to happen.