We haven’t heard anything recently from the always-simmering-for-some-stupid-reason Kris Humphries-Kanye West beef. No rap lyrics, no Nordstrom boxes, no Twitter zings — all has been quiet on the Western front.
But finally, something else silly has happened. And it is well worth the wait. From the New York Daily News:
Deejays seem to love torturing the Net forward with the vocal stylings of his ex-wife’s new beau. Humphries’ anguish was apparent Wednesday night at WIP, when he arrived to let off steam after a tough loss to the Knicks, but was left fuming after consecutive West songs blared in his ears.
“He was trying to talk to every girl in there and was getting turned down by every girl he spoke to,” an eyewitness tells Confidenti@l’s Marianne Garvey.
Our source, who watched Humphries foul out until 4 a.m., says deejays Chuck Barrett and Scram Jones played a list of West’s tunes, and by the time they got to “Mercy” and “Clique,” Humph was on fire.
“He took a bottle of Patron that he didn’t pay for, put it in front of his crotch and dumped the entire thing on the floor, because he was wasted and tired of Kanye songs,” says the source. “Not only was he acting like he was peeing the bottle out, he insisted on staying.”
On one hand, Kanye West songs get played all the time because people like to dance to them and they are very popular and this could have been a coincidence that Kris Humphries got unnecessarily mad at. And that is really funny, like he’s expecting to go out to a club and not hear a Kanye song. Whoops.
But on the other more malevolent hand, if the DJs really were playing Kanye West songs to drive Kris Humphries insane and it worked, then that is even funnier. Like one of the funniest things ever, but only because it drove him so crazy that he freaked out and made a Patron penis that he used to fake pee all over the place. Kanye West songs might have literally driven Kris Humphries insane, if only temporarily.
Knowing this, shouldn’t every NBA team play Kanye songs any time Kris Humphries takes the floor? Seems like an easy way to psych out a visiting player. Don’t be surprised if this starts happening, and don’t be surprised if Kris Humphries starts playing with earplugs in.
(via Michael Lee)