Ballin: On the last day of the NBA season, one of the best things to do is look at random players having huge lines because no one else is playing. With that in mind, let’s shout out the Atlanta Hawks’ Mike Scott for his 23 points and 14 rebounds in a Hawks loss. Can’t imagine we’ll have too many more Mike Scott shoutouts throughout the playoffs, so let’s just give him a Dundie right now.
Not so much: The Jazz, playing the literal definition of a must-win game, scored 70 points and saw everyone one of their players except Al Jefferson be outscored by Darrell Arthur, who had a whopping 11 points. Good riddance (time of your life).
History: Stephen Curry broke the all-time single season three-pointers made record last night. Don’t believe me, just watch.
I haven’t seen it yet, but I have to imagine there will be a YouTube compilation of all 272 threes that Curry made this season coming very soon. When it drops, download it and show it to your children when they’re old enough to play basketball.
Pau-llin: Even though the Lakers’ must-win game turned in to would-be-pretty-cool-to-win game once the Jazz laid an egg, let’s still have some mad #respect for Pau Gasol throwing up a 17-20-11 triple-double in what should have been the Lakers’ biggest game of the season. He averaged 17.5 points, 12.1 rebounds and 6.6 assists in April, and let me tell you, I love good Pau.
Cellar watch: The Bobbycats beat the Cavaliers, while the Magicians lost to the Heat, which means Orlando finished the season as the worst team in the league and will have the most balls in this summer’s ball-grab. Congratulations on having your Dwight Howard trade work out perfectly?
Nice one: The Timberwolves might have missed the eighth seed by a mere 14 games, but you don’t see in-game 360s very often, so enjoy some Derrick Williams getting busy in Minnesota’s win.
Here’s a helpful hint for all those aspiring 360ers out there — if you do most of your spinning while you’re still on the ground, it’s easier to finish the full revolution when you’re in the air, and people will still consider your dunk a true 360.
Boogie Down Productions: DeMarcus Cousins went for 36 points and 22 rebounds in the Kings’ loss to the Clippers — which clinched first round homecourt advantage for L.A., by the by — in what may be the final game for the Kings in Sacramento, so the NBA suspended him for the entire summer and he won’t be eligible to return to the league until the start of next season.
Rock sauce: Here is the most metal, most slow-mo, most snowboard video version of Chandler Parsons’ game-tying three that you will ever see.
Props to both the Rockets and Lakers for playing a really good game when they only thing that really mattered was seeding. That was nice of them.
Goodbye: Of the following non-playoff teams, who are you going to miss the most? Your choices are: Philadelphia, Toronto, Detroit, Washington, Cleveland, Charlotte, Orlando, Utah, Dallas, Portland, Minnesota, Sacramento, New Orleans or Phoenix. I’d probably pick the Mavericks, but I’m really only sad about Dirk not being around. Other than that — see ya, bad teams.
Other things: Here’s your entire NBA playoff schedule … A mop bro barely avoided an angry confrontation with James Harden’s beard … Even Andrei Kirilenko doesn’t know how he made this shot … This infographic about Stephen Curry’s 2012-13 season isn’t actually that informative, but it does look nice … Here are Kings fans hanging around Sleep Train Arena for an hour after what may be their last game in the city … Probably the weirdest hybrid jersey I’ve seen since Nelly at Super Bowl XXXV, but at least there’s a good story behind it … Really great tribute to the Boston Marathon victims at last night’s Raptors-Celtics game