Archive for the ‘Chicago Bulls’ Category

jimmy-butler-blue-jean-barefoot

“This is real life!”Jimmy Butler, noted NBA cowboy, upon hearing a country song at the United Center

taller-derrick-rose

Look, I’m as skeptical as you guys are that blowing out your ACL and then having it repaired can make a 24-year-old any taller. But after what happened to Paul George, we have to at least consider the possibility. And since the “report” is coming from noted sideline bro Ric Bucher, it carries a little more weight.

It seems unlikely for someone to grow in height at 24, but I’d swear he’s gone from 6’3″ to 6’4″. I’m the former and we were eye level the last time I spoke to him.

I’ve always said the best way to measure a player’s height is by looking them in the eye, then using that discrepancy to decide how tall they are. There is no more reliable measuring stick for height, except for maybe a measuring stick. So yeah, I guess this is incontrovertible proof that Derrick Rose has grown since having his knee repaired. I mean, it’s not like Ric Bucher, born in 1961, could have shrunk a single inch as he ages. That sort of thing never happens.

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“Right now I’m on a drought, soon I’m going to make it flood.”Nate Robinson, duh

Still bigger than Nate Robinson

I don’t know if this an outtake from a lost Outkast video, a weird size demonstration involving Nate Robinson or just a standard birthday party for a 34-year-old. But I do know that every time I see a player holding a small likeness of themselves, I giggle. So right now, totally giggling. He looks so proud.

(via Beyond the Buzzer)

If you’ve got a spare $100,000 lying around and are reading this website, you are probably OK with spending all that money on something basketball-related, just so long as it’s awesome. And though, as a Bulls fan, I might be biased, I’m fairly certain that this fits the bill — it’s the structural blueprint for the United Center’s Michael Jordan statue that everyone takes a picture with whenever they go to a Bulls game. And it’s on eBay.

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  • Item: Michael Jordan Statue Structural Blue Print Page
  • Size: 24″ x 17 ” (the frame adds a 1.5 inches to each side)
  • Description: The drawings are clear and readable, cheap frame, the blue print was poorly glue’d onto a piece of cardboard, can see the swirl of the glue through the paper, paper has yellowed except where the glue swirls are

Instructions

  • Payment: Paypal
  • Shipping and Handling
  • Local pick up only but will help if you are making the shipping arrangement

OK, so there are some obvious flaws with this — you have to pick it up in Manteno, IL and there is no reason you would ever want to go there besides this, there are some glue swirls on the paper, the frame sucks — but it’s totally worth it to have the blueprints to a statue of Michael Jordan wearing a pair of shoes he never wore for a game. Buy a nicer frame, hang it above the mantle and you’re straight ballin’.

And though it totally makes sense that such a thing would exist, I’m a little surprised it does. I guess I always just figured that the plans behind Michael Jordan’s statue were just something along the lines of, “Build a statue of Michael Jordan dunking and make it look awesome.” The statue accomplishes that pretty easily, but it does make a lot of sense that there’d be more planning than just one guy telling another what he’d like to see. This is why I’m not an architect, sculptor or city planner.

So just pony up the $100,000 and get a super cool, one-of-a-kind piece of memorabilia. Literally no else will have this, so you’ll instantly have a leg up on all the other rich, eccentric Jordan fans out there. Just make sure you get a new frame because that one is bogus.

Couple more shots after the jump. Five Muggsys out of five, for all the Phenomenal Swag heads out there.

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Just a few minutes in to the first quarter of last night’s Bulls-Pacers game, cameras cut to Joakim Noah on the Bulls bench where the Chicago All-Star big man was missing his third straight game due to plantar fasciitis. That’s when we saw Noah rocking one of the most Joakim Noah sideline looks you could ever hope to see — a black suit jacket over a maroon cardigan over a white v-neck t-shirt, with skinny jeans to boot. It was a great look, mostly because it screamed, “The NBA mandates that players not in uniform must wear a suit coat.” So funny, so Joakim Noah and actually a pretty chill, crunchy look.

That’s why it was a bummer when he showed up for the second half in a boring blue shirt and a different jacket. That’s also when we knew something was up. From ESPN’s Nick Friedell:

Chicago Bulls center Joakim Noah was escorted off the bench during the second quarter of Monday night’s game against the Indiana Pacers because of an issue the league office had with his wardrobe.

Noah, who missed his third consecutive game because of plantar fasciitis in his right foot, was sitting on the bench wearing a grey sweater, a black blazer and jeans before being asked to change. After the Bulls’ 111-101 defeat, Noah said wasn’t quite sure what the league was upset about regarding his wardrobe.

“I don’t even know really,” Noah said. “They told me I wasn’t dressed appropriately so I changed.” [...]

Noah then returned to the bench at the start of the second half wearing a blue-striped shirt. He also switched out of his black suit blazer and borrowed Randy Brown’s blue blazer. Apparently the sweater was the problem under the league’s fashion code of conduct.

So much about this is weird. It’s weird that Joakim Noah would be told to change out of his sweater when the league’s rules say that sweaters are OK as long as they’re worn with a sport coat, which is exactly what he had on. It’s weird that he changed jackets at all, when he could have just put his blue shirt on under his black jacket and been fine. And it’s super weird that 6-foot-11 Noah would opt for 6-foot-2 Randy Brown’s suit coat when doing so, though it certainly explains why Noah’s wrists were on full display during last night’s second half.

Personally, I think it’s just a case of Noah looking too cool for school. The NBA knows that a Bulls-Pacers game could be an ugly affair — both teams are top four in defensive efficiency despite the fact they each gave up over 100 points to each other — so they don’t want everyone’s focus on the cool-looking, 7-foot semi-samurai on the bench, which in turn calls for a change in to boring clothes. It’s a classic misdirection that turned out to be totally unneeded as this defensive battle ended up being a scoring festival the likes of which have never been seen.

But at least Noah knows the rules now, which means he’ll theoretically find ways to experiment within the confines of these regulations. I’m hoping for some more post-hippie-meets-Japanese-lookbook outfits, but I don’t want to take money out of his many pockets.

There is no doubt in my mind that Nate Robinson would keep jumping in to Marco Belinelli’s hip-bumps if Marco kept doing them. In fact, I’m fairly confident that Nate would still be doing them now if Marco hadn’t stopped. That’s just how he is — excitable and prone to steal another guy’s celebration.