Ever since JaVale McGee was traded to the Nuggets, less and less JaVale McGee stuff has been happening to the NBA player who single-handedly brought back the term “knucklehead.” It was still a hilarious season for the blog ages, but things certainly slowed down after the trade deadline.
That’s why it’s good to know JaVale still has what it takes to end up on the wrong side of a highlight. (And to be fair, the right side of one too.) Getting dunked on isn’t a big deal, but it’ll be nice to add something from his Denver days to the lowlight reel. Even if nothing crazy happens tonight against the Timberwolves, this is a fitting end to the funniest season in NBA history.
Oh man, did you guys see Blake Griffin’s dunks last night? Both of them? So great. So powerful. So Blake Griffin and kind of a little Shawn Kemp. Awesome dunks, obviously. Everyone saw them and everyone loved them.
Except one person, who neither saw nor loved Blake Griffin’s monumental throwdowns. That person is Pau Gasol and he doesn’t even care if he ever sees those stupid plays again. From the AP:
“I really didn’t see the ball when it went in. I was on my (rear),” Gasol said. “It happened too quick. I don’t have a great desire to watch it (again).”
Nothing will turn an otherwise normal dude in to an old curmudgeon faster than getting dunked on while catching a forearm to the face. That sort of thing makes a 31-year-old in to a 74-year-old who doesn’t watch TV and hates the kids these days in the blink of an eye.
Let’s just hope Mike Brown has the good sense to edit out Blake’s dunks during the team’s film session, lest Pau rebuke the entire team for sagging their shorts and not knowing who Dizzy Gillespie is.
Sorry, Wizards fans. What’s done is done. You’re just going to have to enjoy your Brazilian center who goes for 22 and 10 on 9-13 shooting while the Nuggets revel in Kareem Abdul-JaVale. No takesises-backsies.
You see that dunk right there? That very big dunk by a pretty small guy? Do you see it? You see it. It’s right there. It’s huge. (Seriously, do you see it? I need to know because if you don’t I know a very good optometrist who can can help you out and, yeah, I do get a small referral fee for sending him patients but I’m mostly concerned about your vision.) You totally see it.
Kevin Garnett, he doesn’t see it. Has no idea what this so-called dunk is even about. Dunk? What dunk? Who dunked? Yeah, right. From the Boston Globe:
Kevin Garnett, who delivered 16 points and 8 rebounds in 37 minutes, was asked if Teague’s dunk angered the team. “I don’t even know who you are talking about. That guy’s a nobody,’’ he said.
This guy. Such a meanie. All Jeff Teague — starting point guard for a team that won more playoff games than Garnett’s Celtics last season, by the by — is trying to do is get his team fired up and Kevin Garnett has to go and act like the guy doesn’t even exist. Does Kevin Garnett have to be so Kevin Garnett all the time? Geez.
Can’t he be a little more like Ray Allen sometimes? Ray got dunked on, gave Teague some props and then used basketball to zing him right back.
“Yeah, it [ticked] me off,’’ Allen said about Teague’s taunting. “Because even if I was watching the game I would have been mad because you’re trying to show the guy [up] you dunked on. Yeah he dunked on me. I’ve been dunked on before. But it cost them a free throw [on a technical on Teague].’’ [...]
“Yeah, there was a sense of anger,’’ Allen said, “a sense of, ‘We’re going back at you guys,’ because that was uncalled for.’’
When asked if the late Teague [game-ending] airball was payback, Allen said, “Yeah, the basketball gods are out there, and they watch.’’
See? That’s how you deal with getting dunked on. You accept it then you turn things right back around by pointing out that karma got to Jeff Teague in the end. You don’t have to go and completely invalidate everything just because you’re being Professor Teammate. Ray Allen knows he got dunked on. You don’t have to act like it didn’t happen and you don’t know who did it.
Besides, that’s an old Kobe Bryant trick, denying the existence of a fellow NBA player. Totally Krossed played out. If you have to diss another player, at least come up with something new. Maybe mention how Jeff Teague has a tiny head but a giant face, or that his brother is a better player. I don’t know. There are other options out there. Think outside the box, Kevin Garnett. And maybe stop being such a Kevin Garnett all the time.
DeMarcus Cousins is listed as 6-foot-11, 270 pounds. That means he was spinning with a centrifugal force of 828 pounds of force, using completely estimated numbers and an internet force calculator. This is the worst episode of SportScience but this is still an incredible play.