Archive for the ‘Miami Heat’ Category

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Remember when Nike gave their three biggest basketball players outer space-themed shoes for the All-Star Game? I really hope so, because that was only like a month ago. But if not, it’s OK to forget about that because there is a new concept pack in town — it’s Nike’s Elite Series 2.0 and it’s superhero-themed because space is so last month.

The Elite Series 2.0 is a continuation of last year’s Elite Series (duh) which itself was a continuation of Nike hooking it’s premier players up with some special shoes for the postseason. (The Lakers better make the playoffs, otherwise, awwwwwk-ward.) All of the shoes are updated versions of the players’ signature shoes, with the main addition being new tech in the form of Kevlar aramid, articulated foam, and carbon fiber reinforcements to make the shoes light and strong. You know, like a superhero’s armor, only significantly less metal.

Style-wise, the colors are a bit strange. LeBron’s are in Knicks colors, Kevin Durant is wearing oversaturated Golden State Warriors blue and yellow and Kobe Bryant is in, gasp, Celtics green which is something we’ve seen before but still feels wrong. I’m sure the real ones they’re going to wear on court will be team appropriate, but for now this is all we’ve seen. Not that the shoes don’t look awesome — I particularly like the low-cut KD V, which reminds me of Roger Federer’s kicks in a very good way — but it is always odd when the first version you see of a shoe doesn’t match the player’s team. Though, to be fair, superheroes tend to match their armor and not their favorite sporting franchise. I mean, Spider-Man would never wear orange and blue shoes.

All three shoes release April 28 and I’m sure they’ll be more expensive than the standard versions of these shoes, what with all that fancy stuff added. No idea if the rest of the armor comes with the shoes, but if not, it’s probably pretty easy to make it yourself. After all, Tony Stark built an entire suit of armor AND arc reactor while trapped in a cave, so I’m sure you can handle a chest plate and some metal leggings.

Lots of pics after the jump. Let’s hear what you think in the comments.

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When LeBron James sent Jason Terry to Tha Crossroads with a very tall dunk, you couldn’t help feeling that LeBron took more than a small bit of satisfaction that said dunk was on said Jason Terry. You know, the same guy who antagonized him throughout the 2011 NBA Finals and partially credits the Mavs’ championship to a moment of celebration betwixt LeBron and Dwyane Wade — of course LeBron was going to be pretty happy he’d just grounded the JET.

That’s why I’m very glad to tell you that you’re right — LeBron James is happy that it was Jason Terry he dunked on. From Ira Winderman of the South Florida SunSentinel:

LeBron on Monday dunk on Jason Terry, “t was one of my better ones. And the fact that it happened to J.T. made it even that much sweeter…

More LeBron on Terry, “…Because I think we all know what J.T. talks, and he talks too much sometimes and I’m glad it happened to him.”

I think we can all agree that in those few seconds post-dunk, when LeBron barely took a step toward Terry’s corpse, that this thought — “I’m glad it happened to him” — is exactly what was going through LeBron’s head. Yeah, it was a dunk, but it was also kind of a “Shut up, little man” that was literally years in the making. And just like “Jurassic Park,” the payoff was worth it.

For his part, Jason Terry seems to be taking things pretty well. From Gary Washburn of the Boston Globe:

Terry cont: “My reaction was when the fans were cheering and I went up and knocked down the technical. That’s a great reaction.”

Nice zing. And nice job saving a point on the three-point play. Too bad about you still got dunked on and we all saw it.

Hey, Paul Pierce — stop turning your back when Shane Battier is inbounding the ball. Not really working out for you these past couple of seasons. Just a suggestion.

I kind of hate that Chris Bosh being weird in other people’s interviews is a thing the Heat broadcasters are aware of — because there are few things more painful than hearing Jason Jackson cackling about “videobombs” this and “bombs” that — but Chris Bosh being weird in other people’s interviews is still really great. I mean, have you ever seen anyone go with a fake punch to a teammate’s face? Doubtful, but I think we’re all glad it happened.

Plus, even when other people bite his bit, Bosh still manages to steal the show.

People might tell you that Chris Bosh vibing after LeBron James steals Bosh’s Chapelle robot moves is the funniest part of this Friday night role reversal, but that’s not true. Because really, it’s that “ice cold” pun Bosh makes at the :50 mark — and the subsequent fourth wall-breaking camera stare — that steals the show. What a weird, hilarious guy.

chris-bosh-ray-allen-high-five

As we’ve discussed before, when Ray Allen heats up, his Heat teammates still call him Jesus Shuttlesworth, after his character in Spike Lee’s “He Got Game.” This makes sense, since it’s something a bunch of us normals do occasionally. Pretty standard stuff, really.

Not standard, however, is calling Ray by his given first name, Walter, which is something that’s slipped under the radar for basically his whole career. Sure, you might have heard Mark Jackson or some other overly familiar announcer go with a “Walter. Ray. Allen.” while in the middle of highlights or something like that, but I’d guess most people aren’t even aware that Ray is really a middle name.

Chris Bosh isn’t one of those people. From the Miami Herald:

11) Does anyone call you by your real name – Walter?

“My college friends do. And now Chris Bosh, for some reason.”

Yeah, of course Chris Bosh calls Ray Allen “Walter” for no real reason. Why wouldn’t he? That’s a super Chris Bosh kind of thing to do. I wouldn’t be surprised if Bosh even shortened things up and called him “Walt.” He’s such a silly.

Oh, and if you were wondering if Dwyane Wade still hates vegetables (weird if you were), the answer is yes.

14) Three things that people don’t know about some other Heat teammates?

“Dwyane doesn’t eat any vegetables, no greens, no salad, no nothing. Chris Andersen , it is all one tattoo, believe it or not. Mario Chalmers and I grew up together. I’ve known him since he was a little kid. Our fathers served in the military together.”

Guess that personal chef is really paying off. Also, good luck looking at Chris Andersen without thinking about how all of his tattoos connect … somewhere. Yuck.

Pretty cute about the Chalmers connection too. Ray Allen is a wealth of information, so go read the whole questionnaire to learn a whole bunch of strange things about the Heat. And if you see Ray walking down the street, please call him Ray. You’re not Chris Bosh.

It’s a simple video. Around thirty seconds, like all the “Harlem Shake” variants, divided into the standard pre-and-post-break sections of about fifteen seconds each. Except instead of the video breaking from a single-person freakout (in this case, a gentleman wearing a helmet and a motorcycle helmet and a LeBron James Heat jersey) to a room full of Baauer spazzers, as traditionally happens in the meme, the operation is interrupted by Minnesota Timberwolves mascot Crunch the Wolf, who beats the initial Harlem Shaker with a plastic baseball bat. It’s an easy, relatively cheap joke, and one it’s a little surprising nobody has made up until now.

It’s also one of the best things to happen to the NBA in 2013.

When the Wolves released the video, first during their game against the Heat two nights ago at the Target Center, then to the internet the next morning (with a following tweet that read “You’re Welcome, Internet. #EndTheShake”), the NBA blog community (including TBJ, natch), was quick to name the video the best of the “Harlem Shake” iterations we’d seen, at least from NBA circles, thus far. They may have no idea just how right they all were. As basic a joke as the video was, it contains myriad details and implications that belie the video’s short run-time and single-line gimmick.

Let’s break down the reasons why:

1. Even before Crunch’s entrance, it’s an excellent parody of a “Harlem Shake” video.
Watching it for the first time, the Wolves’ “Harlem Shake” creates the same kind of anxiety that one of those Sears commercials with the fake movies and TV shows does before somebody invariably runs into a refrigerator. Which is to say, that something about it feels off, fake, fabricated, but it’s just plausible enough that you’re not entirely sure if you’re watching a parody or not until the twist occurs. The listless guy dancing in an empty assembly room, it seems very much like the setup to any number of legit “Harlem Shake” vids, but there’s a barely perceptible lag in energy to it — the guy’s just a little too limp in his movements, a little too behind the beat rhythmically. Something’s not right.

When Crunch enters with the baseball bat at the song’s break to lay the video to waste, it’s at once a shock and a relief. Like any decent twist ending, you don’t see it coming, but it still somehow explains everything.

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Easily the best bat-smashing video since “Bat Fight.” Easily.

(via Reddit)