Archive for the ‘New Jersey Nets’ Category

“I can’t even tell you, man, how good it is just to be wearing these socks right now.”Gerald Green, noted sock-sporting dunker, on being back in the NBA

If this had happened to Justin Bieber the internet may have literally exploded. Good thing it only happened to a Biz Markie impersonator because I like the internet.

(via Larry Brown Sports)

Last night, the New York Knicks beat the New Jersey Nets. Nothing newsworthy about that considering the Knicks are 6-1 against their cross-river rivals in the past two seasons. However, what is newsworthy is that there were so many Knicks fans in attendance that Carmelo Anthony said, ”It felt like a home game for us.”

That in and of itself also isn’t a big deal, since we all know there are more Knicks fans than Nets fans. But since the Nets are moving to Brooklyn, that means this sort of thing can happen over and over and over again, since the Nets and Knicks will be sharing a city. Things could pretty embarrassing for the Nets, especially if Brook Lopez is their star player.

No need to worry though. The Nets CEO promises that sort of thing will never happen at the Barclays Center. From the New York Daily News:

“The nights where there are more fans for the opposing team than ours won’t happen in Brooklyn,” Nets CEO Brett Yormark told the Daily News. “We’ll have diehard fans that are going to grow up as Brooklyn Nets fans.”

Oh sure. The Nets are moving closer to the Knicks, so there are going to be less Knicks fans at the games when the two teams play each other? Because of babies? Makes total sense.

Maybe I am crazy, but I have a hard time believing that being in New York means there are going to be less New York fans at Nets games. That seems completely backwards to me, but maybe I am underestimating how loud infants can cheer for the Nets and also their ability to speak and understand English. Or maybe they’re counting on these fans who “grow up as Brooklyn Nets fans” to age rapidly, get jobs so that they can pay for tickets and then go to the games. I have seen “Jack,” so I know that this sort of thing is possible. Plus, “Nets” does seem like an easy first word to learn, so maybe Brett Yormark knows what he is talking about.

I guess we’re not going to know the true answer to this until next year. By then, there could be a whole gang of Nets loving babies speaking perfect English and toddling around Brooklyn with their pacifiers and basketballs, just wreaking havoc on the cereal aisle of the borough’s numerous bodegas. Sure, it sounds terrifying, but that’s exactly why it’ll keep Knicks fans away from the Barclays Center.

“I don’t want to put anybody down but he’s not playing with the smartest guys in the world.”Deron Williams, when asked about John Wall’s struggles while playing with a bunch of knuckleheads

(via I Am a GM)

This time next year, the New Jersey Nets will be the Brooklyn Nets, Deron Williams will be a Maverick and Mikhail Prokhorov will be training for his kickboxing throwdown with professional wrestling’s Mark Cuban. It’s not the greatest situation, though there certainly is potential for some nice laughs.

That’s why the Nets’ attendance is so abysmal. They’re worst in the league in home attendance and only draw more fans on the road because they’re playing other teams. And since everyone knows the Nets are leaving and everyone knows they’re terrible, it has to be weird to cheer at the Prudential Center. Let’s just say it’s hard to get excited about a team that’s leaving, hasn’t won more than 34 games since 2007 and stands to lose their best player and top draft pick within a few weeks.

But what about those people who do show up for the last few New Jersey Nets games ever? What are those people like? Grantland’s David Marchese found out. Here’s a 76-year-old who calls himself “Whammy.”

Whammy’s real name is Bruce Reznick. He’s wearing glasses the size of side-view mirrors and a red Nets jersey that hangs to the middle of his thighs. “[Paul] Pierce comes to the line,” continues Whammy, “and I start yelling, ‘I’m gonna put the whammy on you, 34! Whaaammy on you, 34! And Pierce, he says to me, ’34? What’s my name? You know my name!’” Whammy chomps a chocolate chip cookie. “And Pierce misses the free throw! The whammy worked!” Then what? “Pierce makes his next 11. It’s the Nets. Whaddya expect?”

Just a classic defeated Nets fan. No big deal. Who else you got?

“It’s been a bittersweet year,” says the dancer, Phil Tozzi. “I’ve had season tickets for more than 10 years. The cost is going up 300 percent for Brooklyn. I’d be paying more for tickets than I do for my mortgage, so I don’t know what’s gonna happen. But I love coming here. I love dancing.”

Love this guy. Sometimes you just have to dance, even if it means taking on a second mortgage to go to Brooklyn and watch a bad basketball team. That’s dedication, holmes.

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“He obviously didn’t see me be the first in WWE history to put Sheamus on the mat. He knows not what he gets himself into.”Mark Cuban, responding to Mikhail Prokhorov’s kickboxing threats with the worst brag ever

(via Aftermath)

Since that is probably the greatest headline you are going to read today — mostly because this one happened last week — let’s just get straight to things and let Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov wow you with some very Russian billionaire-y quotage. From the New York Daily News:

Thoughts on keeping Deron Williams? Excuse me, I didn’t catch the question. … Is it no NBA rules that prohibit to comment on the potential interest. So please wait until the summer. I’ll tell you all the details. For the time being, it’s top secret for us. [...]

It’s not against rules to discuss D-Will, because he’s under contract w/ your team. So I was wondering if you could elaborate on any convos you may have had with him, and whether or not you believe he’ll be perceptive to your powers of persuasion? I missed the name of the player.

Deron Williams? OK. [laughs] We met yesterday, we have I think a very good discussion. He really wants to win, and I want to win maybe even more. And we have just — and really, I won’t go into details, but I think this stage we are on the same page.

How confident are you that you can keep Deron and sign him to a max extension? I think he wants to win and he wants to be part of a great franchise, so we have the same view of this, and I can’t comment more. Just, it’s better to ask him what was the rest of our conversation. I mean what I’ve already mentioned. [...]

About Deron Williams, are you worried about Mark Cuban? Let the best man win. If he wins, I’ll crush him in the kickboxing throwdown.

Is this or is this not the greatest free agent recruiting pitch of all-time? You can keep Daryl Morey and his iPads, Dan Gilbert and his cartoons and nonsense like that. I will gladly take a Russian billionaire acting completely like a Russian billionaire. “We have some ideas, plus I can beat up anyone,” is basically the entire pitch. It’s a sure-fire thing.

The best part, obviously, is that we all know Deron Williams wants to leave the Nets. Therefore, henceforth and ipso facto, Mikhail Prokhorov and Mark Cuban are kickboxing each other this summer. Since his demise has already been guaranteed, he might as well just broadcast it on HDNet to make some cash. I don’t know about you guys, but I’ll subscribe just to be able to watch this happen.