Archive for the ‘Orlando Magic’ Category

Glen Davis has gotten T’d up once in each of the Magic’s last four games, which is something I was unaware of because there is no way I’m going to watch a team that’s lost six straight and 17 of their last 19 closely enough that I notice and remember when one of their players gets a technical in a bunch of games in a row. Unless that team is the Lakers, zing.

Nonetheless, that has happened, and now Big Baby is vowing to go silent so that he doesn’t cost himself any more money. From the Orlando Sentinel:

“I’m not going to say ‘Hi,’ ” he pledged. “I’m not going to say, ‘How are you doing?’ I’m just going to come here and play. That’s it because it’s been messing up my game, messing up the flow of my game, and I’ve got to grow up.”

[...]

“You can’t just think that I am stronger than everybody else,” he said. “If people foul you, they foul you. You know what I mean? Yeah, I don’t jump high. I go straight to the rim. But I’m not going to complain if there’s not a foul. The refs know that. But I’ve got to blend in with the game and let them do what they need to do. So I just need to shut up.”

Ah yes, the classic “Big Man’s Gambit” where they mention that they’re going to stop complaining about fouls while simultaneously complaining that they don’t get calls because it looks like they’re too big to get fouled. It’s a vintage move, popularized by Shaquille O’Neal in the 1990s and used by Dwight Howard in recent years, so it’s pretty cool to see this sort of thing still happening in Orlando. It’s just feels right.

Plus, Glen Davis is 53rd among forwards and centers who have played at least 250 in free throw attempts per 36 minutes, behind guys like Ryan Hollins and Greg Smith, so maybe he has a bit of a complaint here. Or maybe, taking nearly as many shots from 16-23 feet (4.2 per game) as at the rim (4.8) is hurting his ability to draw fouls/increasing his ability to get angry when he doesn’t get a foul call. I don’t know.

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Look guys, I’m a Justin Timberlake fan and have seen him in concert twice and NSYNC once, so I can understand grown men going to see pop concerts. I get it. It’s not a big deal. Sometimes you just want to dance and have fun, so back off.

All that being said, J.J. Redick being asked to explain why he went to a Justin Bieber concert on a Magic off-day is TBS Very Funny. From the Orlando Sentinel:

Yes, for those of you who attended the Justin Bieber concert last night at Amway Center, that really was J.J. Redick in the audience.

Redick spent a precious Orlando Magic off-night at the Bieber concert, but there were mitigating circumstances. Redick’s wife, Chelsea, wanted to go.

“A happy wife is a happy life,” J.J. said after the Magic finished practice today.

“I have a general rule that if I have an off-day during the season that I owe it to her to do what she wants unless it’s harmful to my well-being. Her and her friends wanted to go.”

[...]

Redick said he’s not a Bieber fan.

In fact, Redick prefers indie rock.

Haha — cool cover, J.J. Redick. “No, I’m not really a Bieber fan. I listen to a lot of indie rock. You know, like the Divine Fits and AMFX. Stuff you’ve probably never heard of. I’m pretty with it.” Very smooth. Very straight. Very post-grad.

But hey, he is right about that “A happy wife is a happy life” thing. Not only is that a famous cliche, it’s also true. When you work around an NBA schedule, sometimes you have to sacrifice your free nights to silly things like hanging out with your wife, being a part of your family or building a relationship. For some reason, paying attention to your significant other is important when you’re busy five nights out of the week.

Nonetheless, I’m sure J.J. had a great time. Not only did he finally get to hear “Beauty and the Beat” in person, he probably also scored some hot hair tips from adoring Beliebers. Kind of a win-win-win, all things considered.

Plus, if Michael Jordan chills with the Biebs, how ashamed can anyone else really be? That guy has never done anything embarrassing since he stopped playing and is a perfect role model.

(via SLAM, image via Terez Owens)

You guys don’t believe in “basketball gods” do you? Like a real-life, imaginary set of beings that control the outcome of basketball games and what happens on the court? You guys aren’t in to that, are you? Me neither.

J.J. Redick though, he’s all-in on the basketball gods thing. And he thinks they are so furious with the Magic that they let the Raptors hit their first buzzer-beating game-winner in six years. From the AP:

”I just think the basketball gods are against us right now,” guard J.J. Redick said. ”They’ve turned their backs on us. We need to get back in their good graces. Tonight was a first step, if a loss can be a step in the right direction, because we competed the whole game.”

Like I said, I’m not buying the whole basketball gods thing. But if I did, it seems pretty obvious to me that they would turn their backs on the Magic for a few reasons. These include, but are not limited to:

  • Being named “Magic,” which is devil work.
  • Firing basketball evangelist Stan Van Gundy to appease basketball agnostic Dwight Howard.
  • Letting Hedo Turkoglu eat all that pizza before games.
  • Never signing God Shammgod when they had the chance.
  • Never signing Priest Lauderdale when they had the chance.
  • Drafting Fran Vasquez that one time.

As you can see, there are a few serious offenses that could have angered the basketball gods that don’t exist. To remedy this, it’s pretty obvious that they’ll need to make a sacrifice. Personally, I’d offer up Josh McRoberts but it’s up to them. Quite a few expendable pieces there in Orlando, so at least they’ll have options.

Sometimes a video can be funny and life-affirming at the same time. For instance, this one, which makes you laugh but also reassures you that everything that you thought happened in a locker room where Glen Davis is the biggest star — trying to find sandwiches, lots of jokes, a complete and total dismissal of the entire fruit food group — does indeed happen. It’s just nice to know that you’re not crazy and that some things are exactly what they seem.

Pretty much the only think Jameeroquai didn’t do in those final seven seconds is actually throw down the buzzer-beating dunk. Considering he’s 3-foot-7, I think we can let that slide.

I’m not going to lie to you, Chris Duhon’s explanation for his travel dance really isn’t that great. He basically just started doing it when he was a referee at a camp and that’s about it. Cool explanation, Mr. Explanations.

Nonetheless, it’s worth watching for two reasons: 1) you get to see Chris Duhon do the dance again and 2) it allows us all a chance to relive the original.

Still good. Still really good.

(via Reddit)

Do not adjust your monitors. Everything is working fine. This “fast” break just looks like it’s in slow motion.

Your processors are processing, your graphics card is still firing, all of your connectors are connected — cancel your Genius Bar appointment because it’s all good. Big Baby is just that slow.