If there’s anything us internet writers know, it’s that staying in shape is of the utmost importance. Whether that means lifting weights, running or subsisting on a diet of coffee, Diet Coke and bootleg pizzas, we all realize that it’s important to stay active and eat healthy. That’s why Paul Pierce’s Celtics Pride workout is such a godsend.
When you consider how often the Celtics are on TV, you realize the value of this easy-to-follow exercise regimen. Five pushups here, five situps there, some jumping jacks — next thing you know, you’re buying new jeans but still hanging on to the old ones, just in case you become a little less vigilant. That’s just smart household economics.
However, if you really want to trim down, this workout plan needs to be expanded to more than just a few common events. If we’re going to get our beach bodies ready for winter, then we’ll need a robust workout plan. That’s why I’m offering these addendums to the Pierce Plan. And since this video was created in 2010, we’ll be doing a little updating as well.
- Any time Rajon Rondo kicks the ball out to a three-point shooter who should be Ray Allen but isn’t, and then that shooter misses the wide-open three, do five mountain climbers.
- Whenever Jason Terry does his airplane celebration, so do you, while running around your living room. Get that heart rate up. Just be prepared to completely exhausted since you’ll be doing this for at least 25 minutes a night.
- Each time Kevin Garnett tries to intimidate a smaller, more European player, punch a heavy bag for 30 seconds.
- When Rajon Rondo glares at a teammate, do a single pushup. You don’t want your arms to get too tired.
- Upon Jared Sullinger checking in to a game, give yourself 15 back-pats for looking like you’re in better shape than he is.
- Upon Brandon Bass checking in to a game, do 50,000 bicep curls because you are suddenly feeling ashamed for some reason.
- To increase your VO2 max, hold your breath any time Jeff Green takes the court. Breathe normally when you realize he’s not suffering any ill effects from heart surgery. Repeat as needed.
- Any time Jason Collins checks in, jog in place until he records his first personal foul. This should typically result in 15-30 seconds of jogging.
- For a tough core workout, assume the standard plank position whenever Doc Rivers isn’t screaming. Release when he yells at the top of his lungs. Don’t feel bad if you can’t finish the first quarter.
With these simple exercises, you’re well on your way to becoming a beacon of fitness, just like Paul Pierce. Good luck.