Do you guys love hyperbole? Do you think it’s the greatest language concept in the history of spoken word? Are you trying to figure out a way to marry hyperbole because you can’t imagine living without it?
If so, you’ll love this quote from Mo Williams about that missed layup you see up there, the one that would have given the Jazz the lead with just a few seconds remaining. From the Deseret News:
Williams used words like “amazing” and “dumbfounded” to describe what could’ve been the shot of the night in his comeback game in front of the fans that he played for from 2008-11.
“I’ve never, ever saw anything like that. I don’t think I’ve ever missed a layup, even practicing,” he said. “I’ve shot a trillion layups in my life, but I’ve never missed one like that, the way it came in and went out.”
1,000,000,000,000 is a lot of layups, so I am just going to assume that Mo Williams is exaggerating for effect. Because otherwise, that means he’s taken 108,577,633 layups every day, assuming he hasn’t taken a day off since he turned five. I’m not going to math this out for you, but that is physically impossible, especially if you’re claiming you didn’t miss any. I have a feeling Mo Williams is being facetious.
And if you look at his reaction as the ball slowly rolls off the rim, he certainly looks like a guy who just missed the first layup of his life when it could have won his team a game while they’re in the middle of a playoff race. So mad. So stompy.
But umm … not the first time. I mean, he’s shooting 75 percent at the rim this year, which is awesome. But it’s not 100. Liar Exaggerator.
Oh man, the classic “lineup on the wrong side of the court like you’re going one way when you’re really going the other” maneuver actually worked. I can’t believe it. My eighth grade team tried this once and it didn’t even work back then. I guess we should have just waited to use it in the final minute of a 2-point NBA game.
The best part about this epic fail is that Tyreke Evans had a huge lead in last night’s trolling competition, right up until the moment where he bricked a wide-open layup that he got after pulling a Caron Butler on Dwyane Wade. But when the guy you stole the ball from ends up posing Captain Morgan-style on the ball while the crowd laughs at you for ruining your own prank … well, that’s embarrassing. Really embarrassing. Tough break, Tyreke.
In ye olden dayes, this would be evidence that LeBron James is a fraud, can’t finish games and will never win a championship. Now it’s just funny because he never misses shots from anywhere, let alone right in front of the rim on a fast break. The second way is better, I think.