Tracy McGrady tweeted those posters you see up there, thanking the most notable stops of his NBA career. It was a very nice thing to do. But he also forgot the other four teams he played for, which is too bad for those cities since they were a part of the Tracy McGrady experience too.
So to make things fair, I whipped up a few Tracy McGrady posters in Photoshop, thanking each of the cities where T-Mac showed up for a season before moving somewhere else for a season. I think you’ll agree that these cover all the non-Chinese Basketball Association bases.
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This is actually kind of hard to explain due to the reverse chronological order that Facebook uses, but basically, Harrison Barnes started doing these #hbquest safari hunts on his Facebook page where he’d give vague hints about where he (or one of his crew) was going and what all the Barnesheads out there would need to do to win one of his jerseys. Some girl won a jersey by outscoring Barnes’ career-high in Pop-a-Shot, another guy won a jersey by beating one of Harrison’s friends at one-on-one outdoors at a high school — you get the picture, and you can find all the details on Barnes’ Facebook page. Seems pretty cool, actually.
But of all the #hbquests, this has to be the best one:
#hbquest is on now
I am a huge comedy fan. I especially like live stand-up comedy. One of my first shows ever was seeing my favorite comic Dave Chappelle in San Francisco. Well, another favorite comic of mine is playing at a well-known San Francisco comedy club. He’s from Boston and is co-headlining a sold out show tonight. If you can figure out who he is I’m sure you can find this club.
There is also a challenge to go with this one. I lost my copy of Chappelle Season 1 when I moved to the bay. I haven’t been able to watch it since. If you bring me a copy I can keep, give it to my friend who’s waiting in the stand-by line. If you get to him first he’ll give you my jersey.
And the conclusion:
Here’s a better picture of our grand prize winner. What I didn’t get a chance to mention was that I had the pleasure of giving him his jersey personally. I also happened to have an extra ticket for the sold out show that night so I invited him in for Bill Burr, Brian Regan, and Laurie Kilmartin. Congratulations Charlie I hope you had fun tonight and thanks for bringing me that DVD. Thanks to everyone who participated in my first ever #hbquest. I can’t wait to do it again soon.
So basically, some dude who is enough of a Harrison Barnes fan to follow Harrison Barnes’ Facebook page traded his old “Chappelle’s Show” season one DVDs for an authentic Harrison Barnes jersey and a night of watching three super excellent standup comedians with an authentic Harrison Barnes. Considering the fact that on Amazon those very DVDs go for $3.88 if new and literally $0.01 if buying used, this might be one of the greatest trades in the history of swapping, rivaling that time your dad “bought” a car from your uncle for a dollar because it was just sitting there and someone should drive it. That is a trade you have to make. Even Bill Simmons agrees. He ran it through the Trade Machine and it works.
But now the only real question is this — is it nerdy to wear your Harrison Barnes jersey to a comedy show you’re at with Harrison Barnes? It seems worse than wearing a band t-shirt to their concert, but I’d like to hear an official ruling.
This is the music video for Wild Ones’ “It’s Real,” and if it’s not the strangest NBA-themed music video you’ll ever see, as the title suggests, then it’s at least the only one you’ve ever seen to feature closeups of both Joel Anthony AND Nenad Krstic. Or at least that’s what I’m guessing. Maybe there’s some backup center-obsessed band out there that I haven’t heard about yet. I doubt it, but it’s possible. Either way, still weird.
(via AV Club)
Do you mean to tell me that all it takes to get Mike Miller’s always-broken porcelain body is just a few Zumba classes over the summer? Sign me up never!
By internet standards, at age 35, Kobe Bryant is basically a great-grandfather who fought in a minor war you know nothing about. That’s why his latest request is one of the funniest things you’ll see today, in the non-”Breaking Bad”-meets-Miley Cyrus division:
That’s right — no catties. (Also, no dog poop, which seems to be a universally held opinion. I’m starting to think Kobe Bryant isn’t really an animal person, except for when he’s coming up with nicknames for himself.)
Oh, and also no twerking, even though this is Miley Cyrus’ world and we are all just being twerked on in it:
You don’t see a lot of teasers for potential Vine accounts — and you definitely don’t see those teasers proudly proclaim exactly what they won’t be doing — but all this Kobe Bryant Vine research lends itself to one possibly obvious question: why is Kobe Bryant worrying so much about Vine when he already has an Instagram account where he can and does post video? Maybe he likes the looping. Great-grandpas are so weird sometimes.
Great job by Lang Whitaker over at NBA.com’s All Ball blog on this video. All he did was ask a simple question to a bunch of rookies — What would your theme song be? — that somehow ended up with him singing a duet of a 25-year-old song with a New Zealander and also a Canadian crooning an R. Kelly song because they share a name. You know, normal stuff.
Not to mention, we finally found somebody who actually really likes the new Jay-Z record. Who knew?
Tracy McGrady’s announcement of his retirement from the NBA yesterday closes the last chapter on one of the most tantalizing, exciting, and ultimately unsatisfying careers in recent pro hoops history. He won a couple scoring titles, went to a whole bunch of All-Star games and put up some incredible numbers over the course of his career — incuding a PER of 30.3 for the season in 2002-03, higher than any player not named LeBron James has posted in the 21st century — but for many, his career will still be defined by his failure to find team success, losing in each of his first eight playoff series, and only making it past the first round of the postseason as a garbage-time scrub last year with the Spurs. Consequently, everything about T-Mac’s hoops legacy remains under permanent debate, as evidenced by yesterday’s ESPN 5-by-5 about McGrady’s career, which predictably resulted in split decisions about his defining legacy and HOF chances.
We’re not going to attempt to pass judgment on T-Mac here, though. Rather, we’re just going to present the 25 YouTube clips, in roughly chronological order, that best tell the story of his career: the incredible highlights, the tremendous disappointments, the great expectations, the revealing press conferences and the other most indelible moments of Tracy McGrady’s 15 years in the Association. Come to your own conclusions if you want, but if not, just enjoy reliving the highs and lows from one of the most endlessly compelling careers of the last few decades.
And if you see one of the Free Darko guys on the street today, give them a sympathetic hug and an understanding pat on the back.
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