Gotham Classic - Temple v Syracuse

It’s finally tournament time again! Around the world people have begun filling out brackets and making selections based on a number of random sets of criteria such as uniform color or which mascot would win in a fight. Regardless of the success of your bracket or your interest in college basketball there is one thing everyone can all enjoy together while taking in the games: the incredible collection of names that emerge when you scan the rosters of 68 teams full of 18-to-22 year olds.

What began as an idea for an “All-Name Team” ballooned into a “64-Name Bracket” which in turn ballooned into the list you see now, the Top 100 Names of the NCAA Tournament.

First And Foremost
Syracuse – F – Rakeem Christmas

Tourney Snubs
There are a lot of quality names, but I have to mention what a shame it is that the St. John’s Red Storm didn’t make the tournament, as they have two of the best names in all of college basketball on their roster

G/F – Sir’Dominic Pointer
F – God’sgift Achiuwa

Now, on to the next 99…

First Names I Really Wish I’d Been Given
Cincinnati – G – Cashmere WrightOf course it’s Cashmere!
UCLA – G/F – Shabazz Muhammad
Ole Miss – G – Martavious Newby
Minnesota – G – Maverick Ahanmisi
Oregon – C – Waverly Austin
Memphis – G/F – Adonis ThomasI’ll never get over not being named Adonis

Missouri – G – Negus Webster-Chan“Negus” means King in the Ethiopian language of Amharic
St Louis – F – Grandy GlazeAwesome wrinkle: might be named after a Tim Horton’s doughnut
New Mexico State – C – Sim Bhullar7-foot-5, 355 lbs. putting him on here to stay on his good side

St Louis – F – Rob LoeI think he did his best work on West Wing
Saint Mary’s – G – Stephen HoltSteve Holt!
Michigan State – G – Denzel Valentine
North Carolina – F – Denzel Robinson
Pitt – G/F – Chris Jones – He’ll challenge you to a 10-round fight if you disagree with his performance
Iowa State – G – Babu Palo – The Dream Cafe will be opening shortly after the tournament

Reminder That You’re Old
Memphis – F – Shaq GoodwinShaq was a rookie in 1993 and 1993 was 20 years ago. Whoa
Cincinnati – F – Shaquille ThomasOver / Under on guys named LeBron in the 2023 tournament is 3.5

Fun With Apostrophe’s
OK State – G/F – Le’Bryan NashBryan Nash works in IT. Le’Bryan Nash will dunk on your family
Georgetown – G – D’Vauntes Smith-Rivera
Cincinnati – G – Ge’Lawn GuynThis is the first time I’ve ever seen “Lawn” in a name
Davidson – F – De’Mon Brooks
Oklahoma – G – Je’lon HornbeakAlso the name of a species in Land Before Time

One and a Half First Names
North Carolina A&T – F – DaMetrius Upchurch
Southern University – G – YonDarius JohnsonThe really boring version of Darius Johnson
Villanova – F – JayVaughn PinkstonEverything about this name is great
San Diego State – G – LaBradford Franklin

Awesome First Names
Temple – G/F – Scootie RandallScootie!!!
VCU – G – Briante Weber
Middle Tennesse – G – Tweety KnightHis little brother Google+ Knight is even better
Oklahoma – G – Buddy Hield
Butler – G – Rotnei ClarkeEspecially fun to say if you have a friend named Rodney nearby
Kansas – G – Naadir Tharpe
Memphis – F – Ferrakohn HallAlso the name of a residence at the University of World Religion
James Madison – F – Enoch Hood
UCLA – G – Khalid McCaskill
Nex Mexico – G – Cleveland Thomas

NBA2K13 Automated Rookies
Colorado State – C – Colton Iverson
Akron – G – Carmelo Betancourt

Best Lineup Of Names On One Team
Wichita State – F – Chadrack LufileChadrack
Wichita State – F – Cleanthony Early
Wichita State – F – Derail GreenYou have to wonder what led to him being named Derail
Wichita State – F – Tekele Cotton
Wichita State – G – Fred Van VleetThere are limericks about this guy waiting to write themselves

Boise State – G – Igor Hadziomerovic
Boise State – F – Vukasin Vujovic
Davidson – G – Chris Czerapowicz
Indiana – F – Hanner Mosquera-PereaDoubles as my favorite Miley Cyrus alter-ego

Comic Book Characters
Western Kentucky – G – Percy BladeA super-villain with knives for hands, or so I assume
Butler – F – Roosevelt Jones
Iowa State – G – Kory Lucious
James Madison – C – Gene SwindleI believe he’s an evil lawyer
North Carolina State – G – Chase Cannon
Colorado – G – Spencer Dinwiddie
Akron – G – Blake JusticeOur hero, saving us from the merciless kinfe-hands of Percy Blade
UNLV – F – Savon GoodmanHe works at the same firm as Gene Swindle
San Diego State – G – Jeremy Castleberry
Marquette – G – Vander BluePretend he’s your enemy and yell “Vander Blue!” while shaking your fist

Baseball Players
Memphis – G – Joe JacksonThat’s where he went after walking into the corn in Field of Dreams
Florida Gulf Coast – F – Eddie MurrayHe’ll be DHing for the duration of the tourney

Imagine These Being Said By Marv Albert Ater A Dunk
Valparaiso – F – Bobby CapobiancoI’m going to need proof this isn’t a Nick Kroll character
Akron – G – Deji Ibitayo
Pittsburgh – Talib Zanna
Temple – G – Quenton DeCosey
Harvard – F – Steve Moundou-Missi
Syracuse – C – Baye Keita
UNLV – F – Khem Birch
Cincinnati – F – Titus Rubles
Colorado – G – Askia Booker
Marquette – G – Junior Cadougan
Illinois – F/C – Nnanna EgwuNobody’s love or cooking can compare to Nnanna

Easy Headlines / Puns
Liberty – G – Tavares Speaks…and the world listens
California – F – Bak BakGod have mercy on us all if Chris Berman gets to say this.
Michigan – G – Spike Albrecht
Iona – G – Tavon Sledge
Norte Dame – F – Mike Broghammer
Ole Miss – G – Cade Peeper“It’s a Peep show!”
Belmont – G – Caleb Chowbay - “Chowbay? Chowbayyy? It’s CHOWBY!”

Challenging Names To Say Out Loud
Iowa State – G – Nkereuwem Okoro
Iona – F – Nyandigisi Moikobu
Creighton – F – Mogoboluwaga Oginni
Villanova – F – Mouphtaou Yarou
Villanova – G – Achraf Yacoubou
Illinois – F/C – Ibby Djimde
James Madison – G – Alioune Diouf

Interesting Basketball-Related Names
LIU Brooklyn – G – Jason BrickmanNot the most reassuring last name
Colorado – G – Beau Gamble - “It didn’t work out, but it was a Beau Gamble”
Miami – F – Erik Swoope
North Carolina State – G – Staats BattleDoubles as the definition of most sports arguments
Michigan State – G – Russell ByrdI’ll take a shot in the dark and say his parents are Celtics fans. (Wears #0)

2nd Generation Talent
Michigan – F – Glenn Robinson IIIThe Little Big Dog
Michigan – G – Tim Hardaway Jr
Southern University – C – Madut Bol
UCLA – G – Larry Drew II

Guys who are already in the NBA
South Dakota State – G – Taevaunn PrinceStop saying Tayshaun
San Diego State – F – James Johnson
UNLV – Daquan Cook
Pacific – C – Tim ThomasAlso the best goalie in the whole NCAA tournament
UCLA – F/C – Tony Parker

There you have it, the Top-100 (plus two) names to enjoy while you’re watching the action for the next 3 weeks.

Comments (4)

  1. forgot David Stockton

  2. thank you so much for this.

  3. guessing there aren’t alot of white guys on this list…

  4. What about Jordair Jett from St Louis or Andre Nation from James Madison

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